Perfect Woman

The notion of romantic partnership was on my mind, and I concluded that I am best left on my own, for everyone’s sake.

But along the way, I considered whether I had a preferred physical type… and ended up writing a song about that issue, now that I am well past my prime.

Lyrics

I’m looking for the perfect woman.

Perfect… for me.

No doubt, no doubt,

    every woman’s fine.

But to be perfect

    she’s gotta have black hair and blue eyes.

My outright favorite never changes.

That’s all I ever look for in a woman… for me.

Except of course for

    red hair and green eyes.

Although blonde is also nice.

And brunettes are just stunning.

Or grey is amazing.

And I’m crazy for rainbow!

So that’s the one kind of woman

    I’ve always wanted. 

Yeah, one with some sort of color.

Oh!

She’d be perfect… for me.

I want a woman... with a color.

No doubt, no doubt,

    any color’s fine.

But to be perfect

    she’s gotta have long hair, no surprise.

Although, I really like short hair too.

Or medium…

    and ya know, bald is beautiful.

Except of course for

    style beguiles me more than length.

Curly hair catches my eye the most.

But not as much as straight hair.

Or even better when it’s sort of wavy.

So that’s the one kind of woman

    I’ve always wanted. 

Yeah, one with some kind of hair. 

Oh!

She’d be perfect… for me.

I want a woman... with some hair. 

(Or bald, bald, baby)

I want a woman... with some hair.

No doubt, no doubt,

    any hair is fine.

But pale skin always turns my head `round.

Although, I can’t resist dark tones.

Or somewhere in between…

    ya know, any flawless, even glow.

Except of course for

    lots of freckles are also very nice.

And my favorite is the imperfections.

As long as the feel is smooth.

Although, rough can also be good.

Or any texture at all, really.

So that’s the one kind of woman

I've always wanted. 

Yeah, one with some kind of skin.

Oh!

She’d be perfect… for me.

I want a woman... with some skin.

No doubt, no doubt,

    any skin is fine.

But she absolutely has to be short.

Although tall can be really cool.

Or somewhere in the middle…

    that can also be very nice.

Except of course for

    shape charms me more than height.

She’s gotta be on the heavier side.

Unless, of course, she’s not.

Because petite is also fantastic.

So that’s the one kind of woman

    I’ve always wanted. 

Yeah, one with some kind of size.

Oh!

She’d be perfect… for me.

I want a woman... with a size.

No doubt, no doubt,

    any woman would be fine.

But she has to want a man.

Or at least someone who looks like a man.

She won’t care about the details…

    like my color, hair, skin, and size.

So that’s the one kind of woman

I’ve always wanted. 

She just wants some kind of man.

Oh!

I’d be perfect… for her!

She wants a man… who’s a man.

Yeah, she wants a tall old fat white man

    with grey hair and blue eyes… and two thumbs.

And that’s me!

Except of course

    I just like being by myself, but… I’m not my type.

I’m not perfect… for me!